Background Music

Life should come with a music score. That way you know when the sharks are coming like in Jaws; when good friends will spill out into the yard for a game of football like in The Big Chill; or when Wylie E. Coyote from the Road Runner will be going off the mountain giving you time to get out of the way before he goes splat in front of you. But life doesn’t come with a music score. Instead, surprises await. Thank goodness for chocolate.

Buying Bulk

I bought granola from one of those warehouse stores, but I don't really care for it. It's one of those things that'll go out with the trash this week. I'm standing in the store and all of a sudden it makes perfect sense to spend $15 on a barrel of snack product I'll never eat this year, much less my lifetime, but it goes in my cart and next thing I know I've got to find a place to store it or eat it up. Either of those decisions will make my head implode, so I'm just gonna trash it and pretty soon I'll forget I even bought it until the next time I'm standing in the aisle hankering for a snack food and all I'll remember is that I bought it once before and it disappeared pretty quickly so I must have liked it and another 10 pound package will go into my cart and the madness starts again.

Important Useless Stuff

June. The month for weddings. And with that are the wedding showers. I attended a shower recently. We played the purse game. You get points for the important useless stuff in the bottom of your purse. Hey! I NEED that travel size hand sanitizer. There’s swine flu, bird flu, cough and cold season to worry about. No matter that the lid is covered in caked on lint and dirt and has become the most unsanitary thing in my purse defeating its purpose. And Hey! You never know when you’ll need that mini sewing kit with the needle thread tool that no one knows how to use. Hems can be mended faster and easier with sewing glue or, better yet, fray the ends and it’s a new trendy look – no sewing kit needed. But there it is, in my purse, just in case. And Hey! Someday that $2 bill is gonna be worth something. Maybe just $2. And Hey! Who knows when some dutiful usher will come asking for that movie ticket stub from the show I saw last month. And Hey! I don’t even know why I still carry the library card from a town I haven’t lived in for years and expired grocery coupons. Shrug.
My friend’s son picked up a rock and asked her to keep it for him. It’s been in her purse for days along with an old Beatles 8-track tape. She doesn’t own an 8-track player. She won.

Inconvenient Hassles

Why is it that a storm can come up and then an hour later the sun comes out leaving no trace of the prior storm; except for the hail marks in your now dented car. I hate it when that happens.
When storms come up so suddenly and hostile, I tend to review my relationship with God when the tornado sirens go off. I begin the bargaining process: Take the hideous hand painted lamp from Aunt Lenabell off to see the Wizard, but leave the autographed Troy Aikman poster on the wall.
Then reality sets in and because I have adequate insurance coverage I decide to just grab the photo albums and the chocolate before taking cover.